Years ago, an argument that started from nothing turned into a real fight between my husband and me - raised voices, heated words, tension.

And then I saw him. My young son was standing beside me. Crying.

I stopped immediately. I picked him up and took him aside. I sat him on my lap, held him close, and we cried together, quietly. He cried from fear and pain, and I cried from the deep sorrow of knowing I had caused him suffering.

When he calmed down, I asked: "What are you feeling?"

His answer has been engraved in me ever since:

"I feel like someone punched me all over my body, and now my whole body hurts from it."

I wrapped him tighter, and we cried in silence.

Our Secret Sign

When he settled, he told me he wanted to create a sign - one that would remind me never to lose my temper at home again.

"That's a wonderful idea, " I replied. "Let's make an agreement: from now on, for life. The moment you see me raising my voice at home, no matter what about or at whom, you come close and raise your hand. That will be our sign that it's time to stop. That will be our secret."

And so it was.

Every time I started to lose my footing, he would come close, smile at me, and raise his gentle little hand. And I would wink at him, raise my hand back - and immediately calm down.

I would take a few steps back, and leave the anger, the principles, and the ego outside our home.

What I Learned

My son has grown up now. I'm writing this to you years later.

The experience he went through is etched into me, and I never want it to leave me.

I would never allow anyone to strike the bodies of my children; to make them feel frightened, helpless, and in pain. So I certainly won't allow myself to hurt them.

Our children are our most precious treasures. And one of the most meaningful gifts we can give them beyond our love is a peaceful home.

Wishing that your children and grandchildren always feel safe in your home,
❤️ Hannah